3 Simple Activities to Prioritize Mental Health on Difficult Days

Over the past few years, I've truly learned that unless you're fully yourself, you can't help those around you. This past year, I haven't paid much attention to my mental health, and it's taken a toll on me. I've been running low on energy, and having Lupus hasn't made it any easier. Lupus has been my main focus for the last three years, so much so that I forgot to take care of my mental health. It's this lack of self-care that has inspired this post. 

Reach Out to a Friend

The sudden passing of beloved Cheslie Kryst on January 30, 2022, made me, and the world, rethink and refocus on mental health. I've often considered seeing my therapist again, but then the thought of ‘why bother’ overwhelms me. I remember past sessions where I brushed things off, saying, "It's not that big of a deal." I find it hard to dive deep into my thoughts for a few reasons.

First: As a Black woman, I’ve been told we are strong and must carry the weight of the world while maintaining beauty, grace, and gratefulness for the opportunity to (fill in the blank). Is it just me?

Second: I often don’t feel the freedom to speak about my mental struggles, mainly out of fear of being labeled "depressed" or "weak." I'm not sure if this is something intentionally given to me or a burden I took on because of society's views on women—especially Black women. But I do know I’m not alone. There's a movement among Black women to stop the narrative of the “Strong Black Woman,” because it doesn’t leave space for us to have days where we just exist in the world. We're expected to smile through global, societal, economic, and family issues.

Third: Sometimes, it feels like I'm in an abusive relationship with society that expects me to be thankful for the bare minimum. I'm supposed to find joy in a relationship, no matter how much that same relationship breaks me down and silences my voice. Even with this, I’m expected to save the world that has hurt me. Sis, it’s not just you, and no, you’re not the only one suffering in silence.

So, what I’m saying is: check on your strong friends. They might be struggling too. A simple check-in could save a life.

Journaling (Daily Meditation Journal), $10.99

I love writing. It’s been my safe space where I can unload my thoughts, ideas, goals, and prayers. Over the years, my journaling has been on and off, and for the past 8 years, it’s been on the decline. Right now, this blog is the only thing that keeps me writing consistently. I’ll admit, I’m not as deep as I would be in my journal, but I hope to eventually get there.

Looking back, I can say that not journaling has definitely affected my mental health. If you're reading this post-pandemic, you may not fully remember the aftermath, but the pandemic really shook the world's mentality. People became so overwhelmed that many chose suicide over the isolation, and countless marriages ended in divorce. I, too, experienced bad anxiety—so much so that I couldn’t sleep. My mind just wouldn’t turn off. I remember jumping out of my sleep, haunted by thoughts of the people dying and the struggles people were facing due to the virus. To calm myself, I started talking to friends and reading. Little by little, I started feeling like myself again, and my anxiety started to ease. Now, I can say it’s rare for me to feel anxious.

Writing is a great way to clear your mind, so I encourage you to get yourself or a friend a journal. Look for journals that have prompts, like 5-year journals, spiritual journals, work-focused journals, or a meditation journal. They can really help kickstart your writing practice. 

Unplug from Social Media

At the height of the pandemic, social media was my main source of news. I spent hours scrolling through TikTok and Instagram to keep up with the latest infection rates, death tolls, and the war between the mask vs. unmasked debate. It was during this time that I felt the highest levels of anxiety. I was always waiting for the next bad thing to happen.

Not only was the virus spreading, but we were also fighting each other. Seeing Black people dying at the hands of law enforcement was now a constant reminder on social media. The constant exposure to negativity created the perfect storm for depression and anxiety. The algorithm just kept feeding me the most highly ranked, often distressing content. It was hard to find anything positive during that time.

Turning off your social media notifications, or logging out for at least an hour a day, can be a huge relief for your mental health. During that time, try reading a book, listening to your favorite music, singing and dancing like no one’s watching, or enjoying a relaxing bath. Do whatever you need to do to distract your mind and find some peace.

Use a Self-Care Checklist

Here are some additional tips for mental health days. Feel free to share this list with your friends and family. I’ve created this checklist based on things I love to do, but feel free to customize it for yourself.